HOW TO: For Boys Wanting to Date Girls

I have a friend who has an impressive amount of first date experience and she helped me compile this list of "What Not to Do's" for boys on a first date or when asking a girl out.

This is meant to give real and actual advice because we are well aware how difficult dating girls must be. 

Best Way to Ask Someone Out:

• Not in public---that's a good tactic if you want to trick her into saying yes, but not if you want a genuine answer.
• Not over Facebook--if you need to go through Facebook to get someone's number, I'm okay with that. But CALL or ASK IN PERSON. It's scary I'm sure, but it's SO much more manly. And if you ask on Facebook she can just pretend like she didn't get it. 
• Explain what we're doing. Do I need to look hot in heels or are we hiking (aliteration, holla!)? Are we eating or should I eat before to avoid being hangry at you the whole time? 
• Don't try and arrange something via texts. It makes my thumbs hurt.

First Dates:

Don't make it: 

• Overly long. Marathon dates are great when you're madly in love but it's nice to have a limited time frame for first encounters. She can't miss you if you never leave.
• Super expensive. Makes the girl feel awkward if you drop a bunch of cash up front (there'll be time for that later).
• Somewhere in swimsuits. There are lots of fun things to do in water--but it's hard not to assume you just want to check out our bodies.
• Just keep it simple. Most of us are not judging your bank account or abs straight-away but how you interact with other humans. 
• Maybe you're asking out someone you don't really know and that's cool but if you have any idea of her interests try and plan something around that. If it's someone like me who posts all over Facebook "OMGoooooosh I LOVE THIS PIZZA PLACE" or "I WOULD KILL FOR A FROSTY" then you know you can't go wrong with that. That's why they invented Facebook. But, seriously, if anyone wants to ask me out for Italian pizza...

Don't talk about sex on a first date. Don't follow up with, "This isn't the first time I've talked about sex on a first date." 

Other Remarks:

• We know "pre-med" and "pre-law" aren't real majors. It's okay if you're studying English as an undergrad, just say so. It's a better conversational move, because otherwise it's like, "cool, let me know what that's like in 7 years." 
• If you kiss a girl, you better have something to say for yourself because most girls are going to interpret that as meaning you like her. Tred lightly in that territory. 
• Remember the whole "just be honest" thing. Don't use us as part of some game or competition.  Because we will write an angry song about you---or worse.

General Don'ts:

• Don't wear a snuggy...And especially don't wear a snuggy and then draw massive attention to yourself by jumping up and down and shouting.
• Don't wear less clothes than I am. Those super short cut-offs? Not exactly the knight in shining armor look. James Bond can pull it off, but he's one of a kind. 
• Don't look up my starting salary and then announce it to a large group of people. Don't then say, "It's okay, you can find a man to take care of you." Even the non-feminists don't want you to tell them that they need you for survival.
• Don't get someone's number and then not call! What is up with that? 
• Don't say you want to watch a chick flick because you like them when what you really mean is "I want to watch a chick flick so I can make out with you." 
• When I tell you I am studying Art History do not respond with, "So you're studying porn?" 
• Don't almost get me fired from my job and then try and ask me out.
• Don't preface anything with something like, "I find you strangely attractive" or something similar. That only worked for Darcy...and even he had to redeem himself. 

Hope this helps you find a future Valentine! 

If you have How-To's for girls and dating you can leave them in the comments.