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Jan 23, 2009

Reasons You Should Feel Sorry for Girls

Once a month (don't worry I am not going into details) we suffer bloating, excess pimples, cramps, incontrollable mood swings, and basically any horrible side effect you can imagine.

When you are a girl being fat, ugly, and in pain are about the top three worst things. Add to this an extra dose of moodiness (because fatness, ugliness, and pain are not enough of a reason to be moody) and it's just not fair.

It's hard to want to do anything when it feels like a grenade went off in your abdomen. I've had cramps that would bring an elephant to its knees (did you know elephants are the only animal with four knees?)

All this for a chance at having a baby, which I am not interested in at this point. Oh, and then there's that whole having a baby thing...

So, tell me, what do guys have to deal with exactly?

Being taken seriously in the workplace and in sports? Getting to play the coolest characters in movies? Being able to walk around at night without their mothers worrying? Getting to wear exceptionally great smelling deodorant? Being great at opening pickle jars?

I love boys, a lot, and the one benefit to being a girl is that I get to love boys...but I am failing to see the fairness.

Guys can even wear pink. We girls have nothing!

All this being said, I know that having children is a magical and wonderful thing and will change my life someday. I know there are people who can't have children and desperately wish they could and I wouldn't give it up, as much as I hate the monthly pain and the thought of something growing inside of me and then forcing its way out. I know I'll hold a slimy, little, wrinkly red thing in my arms and actually love it more than I love myself. Which is pretty cool.

5 comments:

E. said...

Okay, laughing out loud in a silent lab? Not that cool. But you so win at life.

amaduli said...

I assure you loving girls for the aesthetic quality is a boon for the chaps. I don't envy the ladies who are stuck with the ungainly male form.
However, women are lucky to be paired opposite the calm, sensible dignity that is the mature male mind.

Brooke said...

ahhh. I watched that documentary "The Business of Being Born" last night...
and besides being slightly scarred and mortified by watching 12+ live births
it also REALLY made me wonder: "why do people EVER have babies?"

Especially MORE than one. Because by the 2nd you know what's coming.

Lawsy said...

I don't know why you would ever watch something like that.

Brooke said...

ahahaha. Well it was also fascinating and eye-opening.
someone recommended it to me and I wanted to learn more.
and I guess I also learned how beautiful and important the whole pregnancy/birth thing is. heh.
even when I was cringing...